Once while on a missions trip to serve the inner city poor, a man said to us “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it.” Mind you, this man was not wealthy nor did he have what most would consider a “desirable” life.
He did, however, have joy.
So many people, myself included, get so caught up in the next thing, saying “I’ll be happy when I...
... have a degree
... get married
... buy a house
... have kids
... make x amount of money
And the list goes on and on.
You see, when our eyes are fixed on some future event or circumstance, we are blinded from seeing the blessings that are right in front of us.
On the flip side, some people waste all of their energy hating their current situation that any joy they once had becomes poisoned by this one circumstance. They refuse to be happy because their boss is a jerk or they can’t get pregnant despite their best efforts. They resist joy because their kids won’t behave or their husband works too much. They hold on to bitterness because someone else has more money and a nicer house.
The truth of the matter is that life is messy. There will always be things we don’t like and things we wish we could change. Bad things happen. Hard choices have to be made. Nobody’s life is perfect.
When you’re dealt a crappy hand or something doesn’t go you way, you have a choice.
You can complain and sulk and feel bad for yourself (which is basically handing the enemy the key to your heart and inviting him to wreak havoc on your attitude and emotions).
OR
you can choose joy.
Although this sounds simple, I recognize it’s quite difficult and complicated so I’ve thought of some practical steps to help you say “yes” to joy even when your circumstances make you want to sprint in the opposite direction and welcome the doom and gloom.
Feel your emotions with the Lord (not your friends who will join your pity party). Cry, scream, yell, whatever you need to do and just lay it all at His feet. He is willing and able to take the burden from you so let it all out. Don’t hold back; God is not afraid of your feelings. In the book of Psalms you will find David venting to God many times. He wasn’t afraid to be open and honest about his human feelings.
“O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand?” Psalms 13:1-2
Turn your eyes from your circumstances to your God. As much as we’d liketo be the ruler of the universe and make everything go our way, we cannot. But guess who can? God. Not only does He have control, but He sees what we don’t and He knows what’s best. When we acknowledge that He is in control and surrender to His will, we can be free!
“Acknowledge that the Lord is God! He made us, and we are his. We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.” Psalm 100:3
Cultivate a thankful heart. I say “cultivate” because thankfulness is contrary to our sinful nature and takes effort. However, the more we intentionally plant seeds of thankfulness in our hearts, the more it will grow and produce continuous thankfulness in our lives. No matter what you’re going through, there’s always something to be thankful for if you take the time to look.
“Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name.” Psalms 100:4
You see, joy isn’t about being happy with our circumstances. Happiness comes and goes; it depends on other people and events we usually can’t control.
But joy, true joy, resides in our hearts no matter what our circumstances look like.
The way we respond to our circumstances has a profound impact on our attitude and the way we perceive things. If we respond to tough situations by choosing joy, not only will we enjoy our lives more, but we will be a light that God can use to shine into the darkness of the lives of those around us. Which is what life is really about.
